Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Housing "Experts"

We continue to press on with the house hunt. Ok so we were virgins to the 2 family world and boy did we jump into a pool without checking the depth. What was thought to be an easy endeavor is turning into a strange nightmare. We really should've scouted before getting other parties involved. So now after 22 home views here it is.
My realization: There no 2 families in the price range that we want that aren't trashed or fixer uppers. 2 family homes are viewed and carved up solely for investment purposes and therefore are updated or not with that in mind. Hey I ain't living there so get the cheap supplies or hey, I ain't on that floor so whatever! So here goes the home tally view, have a look and have fun.

Ampere Parkway - aka divorce kingdom - Horror scene, needs lots of work, strange neighbourhood, too too close to the back section of town.

Charles St. - Amazing! Bad neighbourhood strange folks hanging out on block, dark, no natural sunlight on 1st fl.

N. 15th St. - Nice maybe too large home, downfall - long time tenants, so so neighborhood

Spruce St. - Huge, great "curb appeal" lovely landlord quarters - awful tenants area aka the other "home" more like slave quarters

605 Broad - Ok I guess, trashy upstairs, needed work, was that a stream running behind maybe flooding??

318 Broad - Huge Victorian yeah! You gotta come in after spending half a mill and drop about another 50-100k to finish the thing good Lord well maybe less if you hire the recommended day labourers aka F.E.M.A.

166 Baldwin - Lovely, all charm! Funky first floor, closet space - nil Why am I coming out my bathroom in the kitchen - oh hey there!

29 Benson - Great, definately would do the job. Didn't take our bid, and won't consider under 500k ummm nope, not in this market. Too many hagglers involved

Broughton - Funky home, long time tenant, bedroom practically in the kitchen - huh?? Above ground pool - yeach! Wierd owner/seller shit.

Essex (?) - Great duplex, taxes whoa 10k! Taxes can only get higher from here, sorry no takers.

Home in Wood Ridge - Blah ok, nice really but selling so soon and big crack in home and just no yard, no one really liked it, move on.

2 Sisters' Home with nice yard - Lovely lovely outside, heartbreak on the inside, this is a childs doll house, I mean the bedrooms so very tiny cute but where's the real house, the kids want to come in.

9 5th Street Fair Lawn - Charming, all the right things ok that's it. Illegal basement apartment, top floor 10 year tenent that doesn't want change so the upstairs - hum weathered, basement - lets get outta here.

30th St. - The best we've seen. Ok backyard goes on for miles and garage like crazy inside - heartbreak, funky kitchen upstairs no living room, another 'room' needs to be dormed out so alas there is a big empty space. Industrial carpet and one feels like they're living in the attic - hummm

Roosevelt St. - Ok great on the outside, perfect neighborhood! Yes I'm home. Door to home opens - ok music fading up loudly from Psycho! arrrrrrh! Blue bluebell floral wall paper. Bedrooms as big as a prison, cell weird layout and pergolay in the kitchen! What is this family room all about! *sigh* Another BIG disappointment. Upstairs great! Hot as hell, lovely "attic" Big bedroom but why do I have a see through french doors that ugh don't quite slide and now everyone can see me as I lay in bed from the kitchen - hey! This is a conversion.

1 Pine - Ok the jugernaut continues. Got out the car and big NO! Right by Interstate 80 and the hum of the cars is quite apparent. Was that Wize Potato chip trucks in the back! Oh God and natty inside, but great basement - left me disoriented.

Dumont - Think this was on Sunnyside or something like that. *sigh* how do I say - Blah! Feels like office space and I feel nothing upon entering here. No washer dryer attachments and just - what's up with the stove in the upstairs apt. Why is the bathroom as you come up the stairs - what! Ok, investment property, rent it out! Did I mention that this was about the only house in an area with mostly all rental properties looking like housing schemes in the Caribbean


Monday, June 11, 2007

Say What!

Ladies Invited, Got Cream? Got Tequila? Desi(red), Marijuana - Billions Served, Dinosaur Barbeque, Little Miss Sushine, Kiss Me, Sweet, Sexy, I Always Get What I Want, Rehab is for Quitters, CiaoBella, Kiss Me I'm Irish... and on and on it goes, the T-Shirt babble, saying what the wearer doesn't want to - I guess. The rise of the babble T-shirt is a new one, I didn't notice maybe I was asleep or zoned out. But with this new summer dawning the smarmy T-shirts are on the rise, all jostling with each other and trying to say something to the general public who has somehow now become avid readers of moving phrases.